The Quest for Words

Snooping around my computer tonight, I happened to find the paragraphs below, with the title above, that I wrote in 2005. Maybe I was thinking of writing a blog or trying to write an article for HLAA. I don’t really remember now. Obviously, I didn’t have a good ending so there was nowhere for the article to go. Not so now! Time to finish it, don’t you think?

Written in 2005
Have I spent my entire life looking for words? It feels like it. But, no, I had normal hearing for the first 21 years of my life. I didn’t know a thing about the ‘Quest for words’ early on. I had no idea that at 21 I would start a journey that would lead me to deafness and beyond. At this point in time, I can’t remember what it was like to not quest for words. I didn’t pay any attention back then, because I had no idea what it would be like to not be able to hear words. I took them for granted.

Every Christmas I search for Christmas music I can hear. So far the best place is church. All my hearing friends and co-workers talk about getting sick of hearing Christmas Carols every year. I long to hear them well enough to get sick of them! Every year I buy one or two CD’s hoping against hope that I will be able to hear the words. Where are the words? I hear the music quite well and enjoy it, but I’m greedy, I want the lyrics. So far I have not found the perfect Christmas album where I can hear the words.

Back to the present: Now, 2010
Words are back! Soft words, loud words, distinct words, radio words, TV words, movie words, phone words, conversational words, words are all around me and I’m so into hearing them! It’s been an exciting two years since going bilateral in 2008 with a CI in my right ear to complement the one in my left ear. Is it my brain that needs to hear with two ears or is it the newer CI technology in my right ear or maybe it is just that the right ear is somehow in better shape than the left ear? Whatever... All I know is that I can hear words again!

Can I hear someone speaking in another room? Bill is in the living room with the TV on. I am in the kitchen after dinner surveying the mess of left-over food and sink piled high with dishes. In a voice I hope is loud enough for him to hear, I say “You know what happens when we cook!” and Bill still in the living room, quickly catches my ‘hint’, replying “You put the food away and I’ll clean up”. I heard him as if I was standing next to him!

Can I hear in groups? We’re a group of six sitting in a semi circle on a deck overlooking a river. We’re eating dinner and I’m easily hearing and following what is said. All of a sudden a loud noise starts up. I have no idea what or where it is but it is annoying me and interfering with my listening. As I’m trying to listen to the talking, I catch a glimpse of a tractor between some trees on the other side of the river. I realize there is farm land across the river and behind the trees. A farmer has chosen this Monday night to do some farming. Once I located the sound, I was able to return my focus to hearing the conversation and it was again easier to hear. At some point, the farmer went away, but I didn’t notice, I had tuned it right out.

Can I hear lyrics on songs? Absolutely, amazingly, yes, yes, yes! We are in the living room chatting and all of a sudden I realize I’m hearing the lyrics of a song that I don’t remember hearing before. I start singing along just to show Bill that I hear them. He smiles, knowing that I’m showing off again.

Can I hear people when I’m not looking at them? I’m standing in the kitchen area of a houseboat. There’s a group of people milling around, talking and laughing. The Chinese exchange student that is with us on the houseboat trip steps up behind me and speaks into my right ear (T-Mic ear). She says “Can he be my security number two?” My first instinct is to turn around to look at her and ask her to repeat. But I pause instead. I’ve heard it clearly and realize she is talking about our oldest son. Our youngest had left the day before and he had been her security number one, protecting her from any perceived dangers on the trip. So I say, “You’d better ask him that”. The buzz of conversation and laughter around me continues.

Can I take notes in meetings? I could never do this before. I had to focus on what was said and not look away from the speaker to write. Recently, I was in a meeting with 5 other people. The other folks were doing most of the talking so I was just listening. I started writing the key points that would pertain to the part of the project I would be responsible for. At the end of the meeting, I realized I had taken notes so I typed them up and sent them out. Only two additional items were added later and both were not things I would be dealing with so that is why I didn’t write them down.

Can I hear people with a strong accent? I’m not sure, but I may be about to find out. Bill and I have decided to host an exchange student from South Korea. She should be a pretty good English speaker. Or she may not be. I’ll be finding out sometime around August 24th. I’m eager for this new hearing challenge!